NEWSFLASH: Today just kilometers south of the Ecuador-Colombian border cyclists from several nations met to formally discuss road conditions and dog bashing weapons, which all agreed were to be used only as a last resort when the fury beasts declare chase.
This summit was part of a cycle campaign across the South American continent—each participant with their own agenda—that culminated in a formal map swapping ceremony. The Canadians ceded their Ecuador map to the lone Gringo, who embarrassingly was the only official present without a significant other, while the Gringo gifted his Colombian map to his northerly neighbors who plan to soon enter his favorite country, Colombia.
The Dutch riders appeared content without a corresponding map ceremony, as the Gringo diplomatically bestowed chocolate bars as a gesture of goodwill.
“All in all, the summit was a success,” commented the Gringo while strangely begging his bicycle to allow him to interview in peace. “We achieved unity and purpose during our 30 roadside minutes together. Perhaps most importantly, we confirmed that someone put this magnificent continent here for a reason, that reason being to cycle it with big heavy bikes.”